On Being Neighborly

What a beautiful morning it is! The sun is shining, temperatures are in the 60s, and a gentle breeze is blowing. The trees are adorned with leaves in a variety of spring greens.

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Thread 1
When walking, running, or biking in neighborhoods, you are sure to encounter some annoying driving habits. Everyone's in a rush, seldom watching for the unexpected. I appreciate those drivers who choose patience and concern for others, demonstrating kindness toward their neighbors.

Thread 2
Today, I noticed a man strolling through a nearby neighborhood. Our only connection was my wave. He wore a doctor's mask, which triggered memories of 2020 and the pandemic. I thought, "That mask isn't necessary outdoors!" My nicer self led me to consider reasons he might have for wearing one. Ultimately, I came to, "What's it to me?" He has his reasons, and I'm in no position to judge him or anyone else.

Thread 3
I recently saw a social media post about the angle of the sun and the risk of sunburn. The main takeaway is that the sun's intensity in April is comparable to that in August. Where I live, August feels different than April; August is hot and humid, while April is generally pleasant. Surely, the sunburn risk is greater in August than in April, right? No, it's the same. It may even be greater in April because I am still so pale, and the air feels deceptively cool. This highlights a possible disconnect between feelings and reality. Feelings are valid, but it’s essential to recognize and consider the truth.

Jesus teaches us to love our neighbor. In his kingdom, love is everything. We tend to define who our neighbor is based on feelings. But when someone asks Jesus, "Who is my neighbor?" the Master tells a story about a Samaritan man, an outcast who helps his enemy in extravagant ways.

As I operate on feelings,
Jesus reveals the truth.
That truth is up for my consideration.
What will a step of faith look like?

Twincaretakingmutualsubmissionism

Twincaretakingmutualsubmissionism is a word that won’t ever become ‘word of the year’. It’s so long that I think I’ll abbreviate it TCMS.

Notice that it’s an ‘-ism’. It refers to a philosophy. The word philosophy means the love of wisdom and wisdom is the skillful use of knowledge. So words like this communicate someone’s understanding of lived knowledge. In this case, that ‘someone’ is me.

So I don’t bury the lede too deeply, let me state that I’m using this made-up word to look at gender roles. These days philosophies like complementarianism and egalitarianism have hardened into adversarial camps. Some of the fruits at the extremes of these two views are so distasteful that many resist using the words anymore. Thus my alternative. Let me break it down.

Twin

‘Twin’ is used to convey two ideas:

Unity and duality

We could talk about ‘the twins’ as a unit. “The twins are coming for Christmas”. Likewise, we can refer to male and female together as humanity. But twins are also individuals and both Nature and Scripture honor the distinctness of male and female. So when we say “The twins are coming for Christmas”, we are referring to both a unit and a binary.

Sameness and difference

Our understanding of ‘twins’ includes both sameness and difference. Fraternal twins share parents and a birthday. Identical twins share a genetic sequence. And yet it’s possible to see difference. Even identical twins express their genetics differently. Male and female share the Imago Dei ⏤ God’s image. Both share God’s love and unsurpassable worth. We share the gifts of the Spirit and corresponding responsibility. And we share life in God’s kingdom, without discrimination. And yet we acknowledge that God saw fit to create us male and female. And as God’s creatures, we humbly receive the identity our Creator has given.

Caretaking

When God formed us from the dust of the earth and breathed life into us, he gave us a purpose ⏤ together. This was before Adam and Eve sinned in the garden. Our joint purpose was to rule over the earth as God’s caretakers. We do this as companions; the woman being the man’s helpmeet (‘ezer). Several psalms use this same word ‘ezer to refer to the way God helps us. Women help men care for God’s Creation just as God helps us.

Mutual Submission

So many discussions about gender and roles gravitate toward debates over authority. A Christian understanding of relationships between men and women have to begin with an understanding of people in general.

Oneness

In Jesus’ prayer recorded in John 17, he petitions the Father to make us one, just as the Father and the Son are one ⏤ the Father in the Son and the Son in the Father; the Father in the Son and the Son in his Church. This is the oneness of the Trinity. It is a relationship of pure love.

Power

Philippians 2 shows us that the all-powerful Christ displayed his power by humbling himself, taking on (lowly) human form and surrendering his life by a means of execution intended to maximize cruelty and humiliation. Kingdom power is ‘power under’, not ‘power over’. ‘Power for’, not ‘power against’.

Source

Scripture tells us that woman was formed from man and that men are born of women. Emphasized is a mutuality of source.

When God looks at us, he sees both sameness and difference. But there’s no superior or inferior. When God shows favor at all, it’s to those who are marginalized and powerless ⏤ until they’re not. We need a better conversation around these things ⏤ one that reflects God’s heart.

One

In John 17, Jesus prays:

I am no longer in the world, but they are in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, keep them safe in your name that you have given me, so that they may be one just as we are one. (v. 11)

I am not praying only on their behalf, but also on behalf of those who believe in me through their testimony, that they will all be one, just as you, Father, are in me and I am in you. I pray that they will be in us, so that the world will believe that you sent me. The glory you gave to me I have given to them, that they may be one just as we are one— I in them and you in me—that they may be completely one, so that the world will know that you sent me, and you have loved them just as you have loved me. (vv. 20-23)

“One just as we are one.” How is that? What is our prayed-for oneness being compared to?

I wonder if it might look something like this?

Or this?

I see unity. I see individuals. I see movement that’s movement together and movement inside of together (often described as a dance). When the Apostle John invites us into koinonia fellowship with one another and with the Father and the Son (1 John 1:3), might this be a way to see it?